Stories
Fig. 2. An apartment Building at Ocean Ave where Safina used to live in Brooklyn, New York. (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.apartments.com%2F659-ocean-ave-brooklyn-ny)
Safina's Story: For Better Opportunities
After facing a big loss in our business in Pakistan, like many other Pakistanis, me and my husband decided to try our luck in America-a land of opportunities. It was a hard decision to move from the homeland and settle at a new place but my mother helped us in the immigration process. My mother is an American citizen and it was on her insistence that we started thinking of migrating to America. To make a long story short, I with my three kids and husband came to New York City in 2014.
Initially, we stayed at my sister's place at Ocean Avenue, Brooklyn. After about a year we were financially stable enough to rent a one bedroom apartment at Ocean Avenue. In the beginning I worked as a salesperson in a deli and later I got a better job as a manager in a nearby 99-cents store. My husband started driving with Uber. Life was busy with school going kids. The advice my brother-in-law gave us in the very beginning helped us in adjusting at the new place. He said, "Don't indulge in any argument with any of your customers. If you confront any kind of harassment, just move away from the scene. Don't say anything; don't see anything." He further told me that this strategy had helped them in survival since 9/11 attacks.
Though it was hard for a family of five to live in a one bedroom apartment, we were adjusting fine. Initially the idea of floor bedding was not very attractive for the kids yet gradually we started feeling at home at the place. Brooklyn became our new home.
Things were going fine unless the sudden outbreak of COVID 19 in the city. The complete lockdown imposed on March 10, 2020 changed things altogether. My husband and I lost our jobs. It was becoming hard to pay $2500 rent every month with no work and no income. During this difficult time, a suggestion from a friend, who had recently moved from NYC to upstate NY, appeared to be a ray of hope for us. He told us how life had become easier for him after migrating from NYC. It was hard to even think about re-migration but that seemed the best possible option in the prevailing conditions. We migrated from Ocean Avenue to Johnson city. Here we were able to buy a house with a mortgage much less than the money we were paying as a rent. All my kids now have separate rooms, and much open space to breathe freely. My husband and I both have started work, but things are much less stressful here as compared to NYC. We still miss our life in the city and don't feel belonging to this place but we have peace of mind here. Though we don't have a lot of free time here but whenever we have we love having some get together with our friends who also have moved from NYC to the Binghamton area. We sit together, eat together and revive our memories of the city life.
Fig. 3. Endicott Islamic Center- a place where many Pakistanis get together for prayer and community meetings. (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2FwwwE)
Fatima's Story: Migration after Marriage
In 2002, I got engaged to my first cousin in an intimate ceremony in Lahore Pakistan. My cousin was settled in New York City and was on vacation in Pakistan. He moved there with his parents when he was just four. My mom always told us how tough it was for her family to send their eldest daughter far away.
My husband’s father was lucky enough to get his family’s immigrant visa just in seven years. My Hala (maternal aunt) used to visit us with her three kids in summer after every three years. I always liked my aunt and had good friendship with my cousin but when they sent a proposal for marriage, me and my whole family were reluctant to accept that. My mother didn’t want to send me away. The insistence of my aunt and assurance that they will send me to visit my family every year, finally convinced my parents. So the Nikkah ceremony was solemnized before my cousin’s departure and Rukhsati was done when my immigration documents got ready. It took three years and I was in New York City in 2005.
Initial few weeks here were literally the toughest time of my life. I had never been away from my family for that long ever before. At that time there were no free internet-based audio or video calls. I used to call my family once a week. Along with separation from my family there were many other things that used to bother me a lot. My aunt’s two-bedroom apartment was hardly as big as my own bedroom in my family home in Pakistan. I missed my personal space and privacy, though I had always thought of America as a place that offered personal freedom and privacy. My husband used to work with my uncle in their family-owned deli, a departmental store. They also had a side business of catering for private family parties, especially other Pakistani families. That’s why I always found my aunt busy.
Since it was my new home, I started adjusting to the new place and lifestyle. In the beginning I used to visit my family in Pakistan every year, but after having kids it was becoming hard to visit every year. After my third baby I even stopped thinking of visiting. One needs a lot of energy and finance to travel with three small kids. My elder two kids started school and it made me busier than ever. I also started working and we could afford a separate one-bedroom apartment in Brooklyn near my aunt’s home. I had made some friends here and kids had a lot of activities to participate in. I remember my last trip to Pakistan in 2018 was seven years after my previous one. This time we couldn’t stay in Pakistan even for a month. Things had changed a lot. Kids had grown big and they felt like foreigners there. I couldn’t feel that old attachment to my homeland anymore. In short, everyone was happy when we returned to the US.
Things changed drastically in 2020 when COVID-19 hit NYC. I had never seen New York City this vulnerable before. Everyone looked scared. Streets were deserted and sadness enveloped the whole city. This virus, instead of bringing the community together, had shattered it even more. Finally, there was a complete lockdown. Schools, parks, shopping malls and all public places were closed. It was becoming tough to keep kids home all day. With the worsening of the situation, our small family businesses also closed. My uncle and husband had to close their deli; my mother-in-law was not getting catering orders anymore. This was the situation for which we all were totally unprepared. One day when I was visiting a nearby store to buy some essentials, emptied racks of paper plates, hand wash, sanitizers and toilet paper made me shiver. I could never imagine America running short of anything. The most shocking thing was the remark of a white lady, who herself was probably frustrated by the situation: “We do not have enough for ourselves here; I don’t know what these people are doing here. Why don’t they go back to where they belong?” She intentionally kept her voice high so that I could hear her, loud and clear. I felt humiliated and hurriedly moved away from the scene. I had tears in my eyes, and I could not stop thinking where I belonged. After this incident I started avoiding strangers and public spaces as much as I could.
One day a family friend who had moved to Broome County visited us and suggested we move too. It was a tough decision. It took us years to make our home in Brooklyn; even the thought of leaving this place was scary. But for the future of our children, we decided to migrate to Binghamton in 2020. I like this place, but I miss our life in NYC. Here we have a big house; we have more space here and it costs less. However, I do not feel like I belong to this place. This uninhabited surrounding scares me.
Fig. 4. Brooklyn Bridge. The photo shows people of various backgrounds. (Photo taken by Zunaira Yousaf, 2016).
Abdullah's Story: Struggle and Success
While sitting at JFK airport along with his two luggage bags and one hand-carry, my dad was still lost in the smell of paratha and kebab his mom made him as his last breakfast before leaving home. He wished it to be a dream so that he would be with his loving family in his luxurious home in Lahore on waking. Just like every young man it was my Dad’s dream to come to America-a land of opportunities. He was considered lucky among his family and friends when he got selected for Lottery visa as a Construction Consultant. Many envied him but a few were sad on the thought of sending him to a land so far that they would not be able to see him for years. His mother and newly wedded bride were the ones for whom it was the hardest to let him go chase his dreams.
Fascinated by the stories he had listened from others, my Dad left for America in October 1969, with 600 dollars in his pocket which were fraudulently stolen from him on the very first day of his arrival. On reaching JFK airport his fellow passengers were received by their relatives who were already at airport to pick them. Within an hour he was left alone at the airport, all by himself. This was the situation he was totally unprepared for. Everything was unfamiliar to him, even the language. After hours of waiting and regretting his decision he rose from his seat and came out of the terminal along with his baggage. While he was still standing on the side of the parking lot, trying to figure out what to do and where to go, he heard familiar words greeting him “Hush Amdeed”. It was a taxi driver who also originally belonged to Pakistan. On learning that my Dad had no place or relatives to go to, he offered to take him to an area called Little Pakistan. He brought my Dad to Brooklyn and introduced him to some other people there.
Here the real struggle started. My Dad first worked as a salesman in a grocery store, then as a lawn mower, a house painter, a helper on a gas station and a low paid mechanic at a motor workshop. During this journey he moved from state to state. From New York to Maryland, then to Pennsylvania, and then back to New York. Finally, he was able to get a valuable position in a construction company. After years of hard work, he saved enough money to go back and spend a few months with his family. Though it was exciting for him to see his family after years but on coming back to Pakistan it became harder for him to live away from his wife and two kids. So he started efforts for the immigration of his family. By the time his family was granted immigration visa in 2003, he had four kids in Pakistan who had grown up, and one daughter was already married. So, his wife along with the younger three kids could join him in Brooklyn. Decades of hard work had blurred his memories of his own country and he had started considering NYC as his home.
In 2001, when September 11 attacks happened my Dad was on his visit to Pakistan. He was visiting his homeland after more than eight years and so much had changed about Lahore. He was more foreign to his own land than to NYC now. But the news about 9/11 attacks totally shook him. He took the first available flight and came back. Things were totally different now. He was treated at the airport as if he were a terrorist. My Dad always told us the story of how they had to hide for weeks after 9/11 attacks. Gradually, things started getting better and they had also learnt how to survive in new circumstances.
I came to NYC in 2003 with my elder brother and a younger sister. My elder sister who was already married couldn’t get a visa. It was hard to imagine that four of us would be living in that one-bedroom apartment which was smaller than my own bedroom back in Pakistan. Soon my brother and I started driving a cab in the city. It was hard to deal with people with different temperaments. We worked hard and were successful in affording the rent of a two-bedroom apartment in East Flatbush in Brooklyn. I got married in December 2009 and soon after marriage I submitted the required paperwork for my family reunion immigration visa. It took us six years to receive an interview call from the embassy. During this time, I used to go to Pakistan every two years. When my wife received an interview call in 2015, we had three children. I was very lucky that unlike my many countrymates I didn’t have to leave my children behind with their grandparents. All my family members were granted immigration visa together. I still remember, it was the best trip ever as I was coming back with my wife and kids along.
Our two-bedroom apartment became the happiest place on earth. Life was going smoothly with some bitter and sweet moments. Being a taxi driver, it was sometimes hard to tolerate the behavior of different people. The worst racial discrimination I personally experienced was after Donald Trump won election. The night Trump won the election I was on the road. A white American guy tapped my shoulder from behind and said, “Hey! Time for you to go back to your country.” I replied, “This is my country”. He said even louder, “No it’s not your country, it’s our country.” I did not respond, fled away from the scene and hurriedly came in view of a security camera of a nearby hotel. He stood there for a while and left.
At another instance I was physically bullied by a black American. He kicked me from the back seat and asked me to go back to my country. I kept quiet and stopped my car in front of a nearby hotel and asked him to get off. Even though I was the victim, I tried to move away from the scene as soon as possible.
The very first day I started driving my cab, my Dad advised me to not indulge in any argument with Americans (“Andhay Ghnghay bun k waha say hut jana”).
With the passage of time things started coming back to normal. My family was adjusting well. Kids started school and in the evening my wife would take them to a nearby park. Life was going smoothly until this new Covid episode. Pandemic and related challenges made us outsiders once again. Survival in the city became hard. It was becoming tough to pay rent because of no work. One day a friend who had recently moved to suburbs/upstate NY visited us and suggested we move to upstate. Initially it was not a good idea to even think of moving somewhere else but it was the only best available option. So we moved to Binghamton. Here we mortgaged a house with less than half of the rent we were paying in the city. We have made a small community here with the families of my friends who have moved from New York City. We have enough space to have barbeque parties and potlucks on weekends. People are more accommodating here. Despite the lack of fluency in the English language, my wife feels more comfortable communicating here. She feels more confident and independent.
Faisal Shehzad's Story: Life is a Journey
I came to New York with my two siblings in February 2001 on a Family Reunion visa. My father has already been here since 1992. At that time, I was 18 years old, and my brother and sister were 16 and 13 respectively. My father used to work at a gas station/ smoke shop. My younger brother and sister started going to school, but I, being the eldest son, felt the responsibility of sharing the burden with my father.
I started working with my father at the smoke shop. I was happy that I was helping my father, but this job never gave me a sense of satisfaction. I came to America with the dream of achieving something big. During the two years that I worked with my father, I had to deal with my inner conflict. I have always loved quality food and I wanted to start some food business of my own, or run a franchise of any renowned food chain. Quality food is my weakness as well as passion, but I had no prior experience or training to run a food business. So, I kept working at whatever job I got. I was still adjusting to this new life when the 9/11 attacks took place.
This introduced me to the new realities of life and survival. Everyone was angry and ready to vent their anger whenever and wherever they got a chance. That day we had no idea what was going on; I was still working at the smoke shop. At night some attackers vandalized our store because the owner was a brown man. Many other stores were also attacked that night. We were asked to keep our stores closed and stay at home. For a few weeks, things were hard but gradually they started getting easier. My boss liked me because of my commitment and honesty. He used to call me Shahzada which means prince. He advised me not to talk to anyone about that issue. Even if somebody says anything, I should ignore them and focus on achieving my own goals. The most challenging thing at that time was to keep your own anger and reaction under control.
Although I worked at a smoke shop for two years, I couldn’t suppress my desire to work at a food chain. One day I finally quit that job, but I didn’t have enough capital to start my own business. I started working as a parking booth attendant at MacArthur airport and within a few weeks I was promoted to the supervisor position. I have always believed in hard work and commitment. If one works hard with devotion, one can achieve anything. I knew there were no shortcuts to success, but I still didn’t want to let go of my dream work. I started a second job at Domino’s pizza to get an insider’s view of the food business. This job gave me new motivation and I felt a step closer to achieving my goal. I worked at Domino’s from 2002 to 2005.
In 2006 I went to Pakistan to get married. My wife was lucky to get her documents within a year and came to America in 2007. On coming back, I rejoined Domino’s as a store manager. My superiors always liked me because of my hard work. I raised their sale from $5000 a week to $9000 a week at that time. I was adjusting well in my newly adopted country. In 2007 I joined Papa John’s to diversify my experience. Papa John’s was a comparatively new business. Working as a store manager for Papa John’s gave me more insight into business and business ethics.
My wife didn’t like me working in the food industry. So, after taking classes as a heating technician, I started working for a company. The Great Recession was tough in 2009. Employees of my company and many other companies lost their jobs. It was hard for me to sit still. For a person like me who had never taken a day off, it was very hard to stay jobless. The job market wasn’t very good. I started having depression and anxiety. All my dreams were shattered. At that time, I already had become father of a beautiful girl. During that time period, I was living in my parents’ home, and we were sharing the mortgage cost. I couldn’t contribute to the mortgage, and didn’t have enough even to feed my daughter and wife. My wife decided to get a job, to help me with my responsibilities and lessen my anxiety. Luckily, she got a good position at a company called Nature’s Bounty Vitamins in 2010. Through my wife’s reference, I also got a job in the same company as a machine operator. Although it was not my specialty, it was better than nothing. Later on, I got a position as the department lead in the compounding department. I couldn’t stay away from my desire for a food business for long, so I started a food truck as a part time business. Life started getting easier, and we bought our own home. My second daughter was born the same year.
For 10 years we were living an ideal life. My relatives used to envy us. In 2020 COVID changed our life altogether. My whole family got COVID. It was a hard time but because of friends’ and family’s help, we survived. Staying home for 3 months was challenging in so many ways. Finally, when the lockdown was lifted, we decided to take a long trip to Niagara Falls. On our way we stopped to see my cousin who had recently bought a house in Vestal. Me and my family liked this area, and mortgage and taxes were also low. So, we decided to move here. I started looking for houses and opportunities to start my own food business.
Initially I wanted to open a grocery store but by the time we moved here, two grocery stores had already opened there. My wife and I felt disheartened. It felt like somebody else had snatched our dream, but we didn’t give up. I started working with LaserShip in the packing department. I had eye an on Cinnabon, as it was our dream to run their franchise. I applied for the franchise but didn’t hear from them for months. During that time, me and my friends started Kababish on a partnership. It was and still is successful due to the quality kebabs that you will never find anywhere else. Finally, in May 2022 our franchise application was approved. It took us a few months to renovate the place and we opened it before holiday season. I worked hard and never compromised on quality and this brought our branch into the list of highest selling franchises. However, it’s not the end yet. I am working on another food project that will be unique in the area in its own way. Although it took me twenty years, I didn’t give up and finally realized my dream. This is what I tell others to do. If you want to be like someone, read their whole story. Do not ignore the struggle they put in while achieving their success.
Amtul's Story: A Dream Coming True
I was born after 20 years of parents’ marriage. My father raised me as a real princess. He owns a very big home in Pakistan. Whenever our relatives from the US came to visit us in Pakistan, they were always very pretentious. They always gave the expression that they had an ideal lifestyle in the United States and expressed dissatisfaction with everything in Pakistan. Although we had maids who took care of the cleanliness and other house-hold chores, I still remember my mom always being over concerned about the cleanliness whenever my US cousins were on visit. With all of this, America was always a utopian land for me. When I finally moved to the United States after my wedding, I was quite shocked. I was so disappointed that I confirmed with my father-in-law if I was really in America. My in-laws were surprised when I called their four bedrooms home, a small house. Not only were the rooms smaller, but they were also lower in height. I didn’t like anything and missed my family a lot.
I had a master’s degree in English literature and an easily adaptable personality. I started adjusting to my new life slowly. Soon I started enjoying household chores. I learnt how to cook, and how to drive. My husband lost his job due to the Great Recession. It was becoming hard for us to pay the mortgage and feed the family. Despite his efforts, he was unable to find any job. I loved my husband and couldn’t see him suffering. I decided to start searching for a job. Job was taboo for women in our family. With my husband’s support I was successful in convincing my parents-in-law, but I didn’t tell my own family in Pakistan about my job for many years. Luckily, within a few weeks I received an offer from Nature’s Bounty, and started working there. Afterwards, they accommodated my husband as well. We were earning a lot of money, and paid off the mortgage on our home. I left that job when my third daughter was born. Later I started working at Macy’s, and stayed with them until we moved to Endicott.
COVID showed us a totally new picture of life that we had not even imagined before. Within days, life came to its essentials. Survival became the only thing we focused upon; these were hard times and we had little else more important. Macy’s had always been a busy store but within a week of the COVID outbreak we had almost no sales. People were just worried about accumulating things they needed, not wanted. Everyone was buying groceries, toilet paper and other household essentials as much as they could. Unfortunately, me and my family caught COVID. At that time it was too scary, and we tried to hide it from our own relatives. That was the time I missed my family more than ever. Everyone was scared; it didn’t matter if you were living in the United States or in Pakistan or anywhere else. COVID brought a pause in an otherwise busy routine. Before COVID, we had not ever thought of moving anywhere else. Now when we all were home, we had plenty of time to think about the needs of our growing kids. Surviving COVID gave us more strength. Life had given us another chance, so we started thinking of pursuing our dreams again- the dream of having our own food business.
During COVID I was getting a full salary, even though our store was closed. After the lockdown was lifted, we made a lot of profit from the Holiday Season . People were getting salaries, or unemployment allowance and relief checks from the government. They had money to spend and they were celebrating survival. That extra money opened new possibilities for many people. Some of us used that money to pay down payments for mortgaging houses.
After coming to Endicott, we stayed in a hotel. After some time, we managed to buy a house. I took care of my kids and father-in-law. I also took care of all the stuff here in Endicott while my husband was selling our Long Island house. In the beginning it was hard for our kids to adjust here, but gradually they made friends. Now our kids have adjusted nicely and are happy. Many other families have also moved here, so we are not alone anymore. Me and my husband have always believed that life is not a one man show; we both work side by side. Though it is quite unusual in our culture, my husband does not believe in inequality between men and women. We both fully support our daughters and let them do whatever they want.
Many of our friends and relatives did not support us and didn’t think it a wise decision to leave our job and house and move to an unfamiliar place. However, we thought it was the right choice. Me and my husband had a dream and we planned to accomplish it. Now we own the Cinnabon branch in Oakdale Mall. We both work there, and my eldest daughter joins us when she is free.
Feroz's Story
I was 20 years old when I came to the United States in 1999 on Family reunion Visa. MY father was already here in United States since 1992. I had done my ICS from Pakistan and came to America with a dream to start my own business. My father was living in Texas, but I was fascinated with New York City. So, I started living with my Uncle in Brooklyn who later became my father in law. Photography was my passion and I wanted to have my own photo studio. I was new in this country so to get experience; I started working in a Photo lab named Foto Print Shop at 88 Broadway Street Manhattan. For a couple of years, I worked at different photo labs like The Robert Photo, Redrose Photo shop in Brooklyn and then started my own photo print shop named Experts One Hour Foto and communication. It didn’t take me long to make my own name in the area because of the quality of my work.
I was settling down in my adopted city good but I used to miss my family and my lifestyle in Pakistan. My mom and my other siblings were still in Pakistan. I missed the taste of the food my Mom used to make for me. I have been a picky eater since childhood, adapting to the new tastes was hardest thing for me. To avoid that nostalgia, I kept myself busy for longer hours at my work. I worked in the Photography field for almost ten years. It used to be a well-paid profession until the digital photography became common. With the popularity of digital cameras people stopped using camera films, negatives and prints. Digital Camera System DCS had a positive impact on photography but not on the Photo studio business. People needed studio only for passports or other such reasons. Gradually with the availability of the option to download image directly, they don’t need conventional photo labs even for that. The advances in the smartphone camera further weakened the photography lab business. Now everyone is a professional and everyone is an expert. Consequently, many professional photography studios, including mine, had to shut down their business.
Later, like many other country fellows I worked with uber and also started a business of fried chicken. Then I understood many technicalities of the food business that I wasn’t aware of. I usually mind my own business and focus on my goals and that has always helped me. When 9/11 happened my immigration case was in progress, I was supposed to report in the immigration office every few months. Other than that, nothing extraordinary happened to me. I was treated like other fellow Muslims and there was a general hatred for all in the air.
In Brooklyn our house was in front of a train station. If you have lived in New York City, you must know about Gang in school settings. That train station was one of the favorite spots of the Gangs. These youngsters do not leave their gang affiliation behind even when they enter the school building. I have two young school going daughters. Me and my wife were always worried about their safety because they had to walk to their school. These gangs harass other kids inside the school as well. For the better prospects of our three children, me and my wife decided to move from the city. We wanted to move but we also wanted to stay in New York State. We explored upstate NY, went to Buffalo and Rochester also. When we visited Broome County and met some residents of the area through IOST Islamic Organization of Southern Tear, we decided to move here. I don’t take rash decisions so there were many reasons for choosing this area. There is a good community network system in the area, and especially after covid community in increasing rapidly. Another reason was affordability. This place is more affordable than Rochester and Buffalo. It wasn’t just the presence of Muslim community or economic affordability that made me choose this county, I observed that in most of the white people in Broome County are also non- American immigrants. Finally, we bought a house in Johnson City close to IOST. There is a big number of community members who have school going kids, so it didn’t take my kids much time to make new friends. Many other families have recently migrated from New York City, so they have a lot of common things to talk about.
Re-migration to a new place comes with its own challenges. From a business point of view, this is still a developing town, not with as many customers as in New York City. Initially, me and a couple of my friends started a grocery store named 786 Punjab Halal Meat and Grocery Story on 104 Main Street Binghamton. Before that there was just one other Desi grocery store in the area, so it didn’t take us long to make our place in the market. Gradually, we decided to extend our business and started Mediterranean Halal house on Court Street Binghamton.